It's Official!

It's official-- or as "official" as medical folk get. The ultrasound was, indeed, benign. Why they couldn't have told me that a week ago, I do not know.

Oh wait, I do know.

My doctor was in Hawaii. On business. Hm. (I do actually believe that, it just sounds grossly unfair.)

I still have an appointment with a doctor here on Thursday, and I think it'll be good to just get a second opinion. I would like to note that I still, regardless of their benign nature, want Burt and Cleveland to move on. I still want a biopsy.

But just so you know, I'm having a mini celebration over here, pleased that this first step is much easier than it could be. Surgery is still to come, but it should not be drama-filled. Hurray!

Six Months? For Real?

It IS good news, and believe me, I'm thankful for it.

I've been told that the recommendation of Dr. Jacobs (ultrasound guy) is to wait six months, and then check on Burt and Cleveland. Dr. Boyd, my primary care doctor, is out of the office until Monday. When she gets back, she'll call me and let me know if she agrees or not.

So that is good.

Really.

Except...

Well...

It feels weird to wait six months. I believe them that there is nothing to be worried about at present, but I also don't want to just let Burt and Cleveland chill in my body for another six months. It's distracting now, I don't think I could handle it for that long.

And let's say I DO wait for six months. Six months is in September, when I am a) in school and b) working on my thesis. I can't be in Seattle when I go to school in California, and Thesis is going to be Time Consuming. If it is something dastardly, even mildly dastardly, even just easy-surgery dastardly, I'd rather deal with it now. And I mean, if they have to be removed surgically anyway, why put it off?

So I made an appointment with a Dr. West in the area, have had my records faxed over to him, and will be popping into his office next Thursday to get another opinion. And let's be honest, if he offered to take a scalpal to my body that very day, I'd take him up on it.

I want these little buggers gone!

But I am very, very thankful that nobody seems particularly concerned by this.

A Letter to Medical Professionals

Dear Doctors,

I know you are well-trained, intelligent people. I know that you have many people who depend on you every day.

Nontheless, Doctors, I'm not sure how I feel about being forgotten. I had expected to hear from you on Monday, so finally I called your office today to find out what I should be doing-- biopsy, waiting and observing, or just forgetting it all and going to Disneyland or possibly Fiji-- and I was told that my main doctor never even received the results from the ultrasound. Excuse me? I may not be worried, but I am distracted by all of this and would like it sorted sooner rather than later. I've got stuff to do, guys. Papers to write. Projects to work on. People to see! It is hard for me to focus on this with Burt and Cleveland just chillin' there, and not knowing what they will do next.

In college, we're all about planning for the long term. I want to make some plans here, Doctors! If surgery is a good idea sooner rather than later, I need to get the ball rolling from an academic standpoint. If it's an over-the-summer kind of deal, I need to talk to my employers. I know we're all busy here, but please, I'm feeling out of the loop on my health!

I think maybe I should be thanking you for something, though. Thank you for making it apparent early on that I need to be pro-active about my health, that I'm the only one I can rely on for this. Doctors have many patients, and I cannot expect them to be more than human.

I can, however, expect myself to be on top of things.

Thanks for your time,

Blythe

Meet Burt and Cleveland

I have two new friends, Burt and Cleveland.

They are lumps, and they live in my left breast. I'm not going to hold this against them, I'm sure they didn't choose to be there, but I would like them gone just the same. I like to think of us on the same side. They want to get out of body, and I, myself, would like them to get the hell out as well!

I discovered Burt's (the bigger one) presence about three weeks ago, and made an appointment with my doctor for last Thursday. At the appointment, she told me that it was most likely a cyst, and would go away on its own. She got me an ultrasound appointment the next day anyway, Just In Case.

The room for the ultrasound was lovely and warm, and even the ultrasound gel was heated. It was not an unpleasent experience, despite the fact that the doctor discovered Cleveland, the second, smaller lump. Both Burt and Cleveland are most likely fibromas, benign tumours of connective and fibrous tissue. (See how my vocabularly is expanding?) It is incredibly unlikely that they are cancerous, but may need to be biopsied Just In Case.

(I can't figure out why they "may" have to be biopsied. Why aren't they just going to do it? I mean, in the worst case, they stick a needle in me for no reason. Sure beats the alternative worse case scenerio.)

In either case, benign or malignant, these guys are gonna hafta go. Fibromas don't just go away by themselves, and they grow. I'd rather get rid of them while they are smaller. It somehow sounds less dramatic.

Anyway, now I'm just waiting for my doctor's phone call to update me. I have been waiting for days (since my Friday appointment, though I didn't expect a call over the weekend, of course), and am just eager to know what the next step is. I'm not worried or anxious (a 21-year-old with breast cancer is so very rare), but I'm certainly preoccupied. I wish they would just call me already!


** PLEASE be sure that you are doing your own monthly self breast exams and, if you are over 40, getting yearly mammograms as well. Finding something is no fun, but it is miles and miles better than not finding something that is there. Do it. Your friends and family will thank you.**