Sunday, 10 July 2011

Necessary Update


The tickets have been purchased, and outfit planning has begun.

Aslan and I are going to see Ke$ha!

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

I need a GPS to find my own feet

You know how some people can get to an unfamiliar city, glance around, and say, "Ok, so that's North-- we need to head kind of that direction to get to the concert hall."? And then they'll walk a couple of miles, turn fifteen corners, and arrive exactly there?

For that matter, you know how some people can get around in a city they've lived in for years, relying on neither a map nor a GPS?

I'm not that person. I have no internal compass to speak of, can get lost on a routine errand, and credit a combination of my GPS and Google Maps with my ability to find my own feet.

Last week, I visited Montana, and spent all of my time in a town that I have practically grown up in-- I've been there almost every summer and Christmas my whole life, and have probably spent more time there than some places I've actually lived (lookin' at you, Colorado!).

But can I find the grocery store? The coffee shop? My own grandmother's house? Nope. Absolutely not. Once I get off of the 90, I might as well be somewhere entirely new. (Well, actually, I finally learned how to find the coffee shop and grocery store on this trip. Thank god.)

You see, most people have internal maps that look like this:

I will take the exact same image, and by the time it gets to my brain, it looks like this:

I wish I was kidding.

You may be wondering if there is ANY exception to this rule. Can I find my way around tiny towns? Places I currently live? The home towns of longtime friends?


The only-- only-- city I have ever been able to navigate without specific instructions?


Go figure.

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

New Species, New Friend

I'd like to introduce you to Clover's newest friend.

As she was vacuuming up cupcake crumbs (cheerfully and willingly, I might add) the other day, she stroked the vacuum cleaner gently and turned to me. "This is Herbert," she said. "He's a Norwegian Dwarf Elephant."

Of course he is.

Have I mentioned lately that I love that kid?

Sunday, 3 July 2011

Articulate, child!

Neptune has a habit of mumbling. And by "a habit" I mean "rarely can I understand the kid the first time around." I was particularly confused the other day, when he told me what character he was playing on the Wii.

This is what I heard:

Neptune: And this character is a Mennonite! He's got a baseball bat.
Blythe: He's a what?!
Neptune: A Mennonite.
Blythe: Look at me and say the word carefully. What is it?
Blythe: Can you show me it written down?
Neptune points to the screen. There, at the bottom, I see the words "Meta Knight."

A Mennonite is this:

A Meta Knight is this:

Friday, 1 July 2011

It's all in the details

Neptune: Toilet plunger is something that the kids love, but the parents hate.
Blythe: And the nannies too, actually.
Neptune: Yeah, it looks pretty gross. But it tastes pretty good. And I like the architectural detail.

Ah, yes. The architectural detail is just swell.