Whenever I go to Home Depot, I seem to be wearing my very most feminine clothing. It's not intentional, I don't plan it that way, it just happens. It's not unusual for me to dress this way, but nothing draws my attention to it more than a good trip to the hardware store.
I stroll in, heels or knee-high boots clicking, and survey the store. At this point, I am feeling at least one, if not two, of two things.
If I know what I'm there for, I know how to use what I'm looking for, and I have a general idea of where it is: HELL YES. I am a total bad-ass. I can staple gun things. I can staple gun things while wearing a SKIRT AND HEELS. I can paint rooms! I am woman, hear me roar.
Or, if I've been sent on an errand by someone else, for something THEY need, and I have no idea what I'm looking for? Then I feel like the most pathetic version of a damsel in distress ever. Even my internal voice is talking with an annoying lilt: Um, I'm looking for a.... what do you call it? A hammer? I want to, um, build something? With nails? I'd use a hammer for that, right?
I'm making myself sound like a total ditz, and while my ineptitude at DIY does not extend to a lack of awareness about the use of hammers, it gets awfully close. And when I'm feeling insecure about my Home Depot knowledge, suddenly even hammers seem a little bit beyond me.
I wish I could tell in advance how I am going to feel whenever I walk into the store, but I simply can't. There are too many shades of grey-- I know what I want to do, but not what tools are required. I know general what I need, but not the details of the size or type, etc. It washes over me in waves-- bad-ass one moment, damsel in distress the next.
Who knew Home Depot could have such an effect on a person's sense of self?